Gosh, it's been ALMOST a month of disappearing act since my previous post, what a lame. And I unintentionally forgot what it felt to have a space for myself, how good it felt like to unleash what's tinkering with my idiotic brain. I can't believe that I was a prick (I can't win for this can I?) to just ignored the nerve of craving to vent and revamp my thoughts. Screw me, if you can.
Finals are here, still wondering how faster is time was ticking lately. Perhaps I was too idle or had died at the time happened(?) Heckyeah, ignore my idiotic brain people. But I must admit that this is the most hectic semester in my record as everyone does feel the same way too. And it quite relieves me when thinking that my shitload of darn workload had been successfully done, hurrah! Nothing else can irks me now and then, here and there but finals. 2 down, 4 more to go~
Speaking of the last 2 papers that had happened in merely ONE fucking day; was horrifically horrid but I managed to strike it as best as I can, AT LEAST I have studied. Noktah.
Next up; FIN 344 in three days. Still need another revamping mode. *Take a deep deep breath* Have to read a lot! I have an allergic with reading anyways. I so wanna study (**STG!) but I don't think my brain can easily digest any investment thingamajig at the moment. Sheesh.
Last semester's horrific results MUST NOT be repeated itself. Wish I can surpass the lame verdict of mine though. Crossing fingers.
SPOILER ALERT!: The most susah nak mampos paper; FIN320-the dinosaur of the semester indeed! Ngaummm. Frankly, I really need to not gain my careless mistaken ever again. This is a bad bad thing. Must get my arse off from the devil thoughts in me. I'm determined to make it happens. End of story.
Still at home since I have a week of gap to next paper, so I've got my sweet escape for that, who doesn't want anyway? Thank you very much!
Really got splendid weekend with Mr Sayang. Totally in love with Baby H!! Will upload his snapshot sooner. Hihi. I've been waiting for him to come for soooo long and it totally worth the patience of mine! Love your therapeutic session, even though got no major plans but we still managed to pun our lovey-dovey mode to the fullest and screwed any massive squabbles that has almost happened. *Clap clap* Maybe we both tired of cajoling&majuking drama heh? Teehee.
This month is one of the toughest month I've ever had and am truly hate it. Thank God, I've already got back home finally-God still loves me nevertheless!
Have done with my fuckload of tiring works and bloody tests. Had been stacked up with books and notes (not a 'toyols') so high around me, it looks like I've built a goddamn fortress. Yes, hard to imagine but oh-so-goddamn-true! Needless to say, I've been rather a churl these past few weeks. But who wouldn't be anyways? I have to stop playing around, have to stop leisurely reading a novel and everything and knickknack. *Huge sigh*
This week was completely fucked up when I found myself can't even took time out to recuperate myself, even a slenderer. I must say, to be a bulletproof ain't that easy after all. For the tests that I've finally done, it has happened as hectic as they can be. Unfortunately, I must admit I didn't pull the best as fuck as I can. What a bummer I was-and still am. I'm willing to take whatever the fuck I might get for now, albeit meet the failure. I won't give a fuck of it since I knew I didn't give 100% of an endeavour of mine. Shite.
To be quite honest, I've been dealing through some agonies about myself and my life throughout these days. As far as I'm concerned, I've never felt as bad as I feel now. So there.
I really value your concern and invisible embrace. If only you know what I felt, you really don't wanna know, I supposed. I hope this fucking sorry ass will desist the heartbreak-drama yet again. I'm tired of being jaded in every second, at the moment that I've already yearned for your comforting arms. I know you feel the same way too. So please think of this as my final attempt to make things right. Sorry is not the only word that I can spell out, I know.
I was always spell troubles huh?
Minor recess,MAJOR ruefulness.
What more should I say?
The youth is starting to change Are you starting to change? Are you? Together together together. . .
Hope tonight I will get my 'refresh button' and my 'magic'.
It's has been ages haven't doodling here. And yeah, I have loads of things that I wanna bull here but alas my head is still sticking up with the fucking laden notes. The fuck. I shall undesirably sticking 'em in my brain with double sellotape since I have my finals in two weeks. I so can't wait for this bullshit ends :(
I've had enough of tedious elongate of angst-laden roller coaster lately. And fuckyeah, I occasionally detest April. If only I can decamp all of these shitty days. Had been sooo buzehhhh, penat lah.
Tests tests tests.
Assignments assignments assignments.
Presentations presentations presentations.
And then finals finals finals!
Twas terrible and relentless and I really hope that this coming weekend will take things down a notch. But heck I know my chance is pretty inconceivable. Humph.
Uh, when the hell lah all of THAT fucking tiring works will finish eh? Somehow, I think I'd better not having my degree-oh my dreams! Wait, I should have not mention about that! I know I'm being such an arsehole now. Ignore me.
1. I hate accounting to death! I must admit, I have an allergic with the numbers. Ergo, do not ask me how to calculate any maths question with my shitty manual calculation. Fuck it. Wonder whether I can further my bachelor of finance or not.
2. Had done my tests in tad dreadful mode. Noktah.
3. Still have another 2 tests next week! GRRR.
4. Got panda eyes, numerous acnes, agitated roller coaster mode, had unintentionally skipped my makan time. This is not sooo me!
5. Note to self; don't simply trust people around you, that stupid creature. Go get a life. Poor girl~
Lastly, I need to get rid of these fucking matter. I should stay strong for another month here :)
Loads of Love, K.
Awhhh not forgotten; Mr Sayang is the best thing that has ever happened to my April :)